Chapter 38
My dull face was reflected on the mirror, polished to a shine.
The maid urged me to smile, saying that since it had been a long time since I’d gone out, I shouldn’t wear such an expression. I absentmindedly lifted the corners of my lips. The glossy surface of my face twitched faintly.
‘My face really has perked up.’
During the five days of staying indoors, my skin had become smooth and radiant. Throughout that time, I had stayed very obedient, just as the blackmailer had demanded. I even interrogated the servants once more in between, but that still counted as being relatively composed.
I wanted to immediately track down the blackmailer and shake him by the collar, but I judged that it wasn’t yet time to act recklessly and decided to wait.
No letters had arrived since then.
Even now, at the moment I was preparing to go out with Seniel to attend a piano recital, there had been no news at all.
While maintaining a silent standoff with the blackmailer, I had to deal with Seniel and Kid inside the household.
I had expected it would be exhausting to manage the two of them while being unable to go out. But surprisingly, the past five days had been the most peaceful since my possession of this body.
It almost felt unreal how comfortable it was.
The one who contributed most to this peace was none other than Kid.
Simply by not causing chaos, he had brought a calm, lake-like tranquility to my life.
That didn’t mean Kid had stopped visiting my room, however. He came every night.
Without even glancing at the lamp, he would walk straight to the bed.
[Report.]
Yet, despite asking for a report, he seemed uninterested in it. He would lie down immediately and casually pat the spot beside him, trying to make me fall asleep.
Well… “make me sleep” sounds strange, but in any case, that kind of routine kept repeating.
Since Kid was so unpredictable, I had assumed it would only last a day or two. So, in order to survive, I had seriously considered learning other skills besides piano.
But on the third night, Kid still turned off the lights and lay in bed again. And once more, he put me to sleep.
‘Has this guy finally lost his mind?’
On the fourth night, I even wondered if I should prepare an extra pillow. In the end, I didn’t.
Of course, I still felt tense whenever he came. But compared to before, things were much more stable now—at least physically.
In the past, when Kid came, I either had to engage in tense, dangerous conversations with him or play the piano. But these days, he would just put me to sleep immediately upon arrival.
‘Has he decided to just monitor me instead?’
Perhaps, since I seemed to be doing well, Kid—true to his personality—couldn’t simply leave me unattended and had decided to keep me close and monitor me.
Maybe it was just my imagination, but recently I hadn’t sensed any sharp hostility from Kid.
In any case, the thought that he might continue coming and simply sleep next to me crossed my mind. If this unpredictability of his were reduced even slightly, breathing would become much easier.
Seniel, after being initially flustered by Kid’s behavior for a day or two, adapted even faster than I did by the third day—his adaptability was remarkable.
He would quietly check on my well-being, cover me with a blanket, close the curtains, and leave without waking me. When I woke up and he wasn’t there, it was almost as if Seniel had become the unpredictable one instead.
In the evenings, he would smile brightly and stay cheerful, and in the mornings, he would disappear.
He seemed to be living diligently without sinking into sadness. Moreover, since he avoided provoking Kid at all, the number of times I had to command or manage him had decreased significantly.
It was a positive change for me. Although occasionally, I could see moments where he seemed to struggle, and suppressed emotions would briefly surface on his face like a sudden collapse of feelings.
…Maybe it was because my first impression of his fragility had been so strong.
‘Seniel’s been on my mind lately.’
If he wanted to cry, he should just cry. Or, as he had always done, simply say he was glad I was alive and leave it at that.
Every morning, he would find me beside Kid—something that would normally seem suspicious. Yet he never asked about it. Perhaps it was enough for him that I was simply alive.
As the one who had unintentionally taken away his “happy ending,” I couldn’t help but think about him in many ways.
But I couldn’t stir up someone who was trying to quietly hold himself together. I was someone who would leave soon anyway—giving him any unnecessary emotional attachment would only do harm.
“Ugh.”
Without realizing it, I let out a deep sigh in front of the maid.
“Is something wrong with your makeup?”
Jane widened her eyes, taking my sigh seriously. She reached for her tools to fix my makeup, but I waved my hand to stop her.
“No, it’s just something on my mind. The makeup is fine. This is good enough.”
“Then I’ll leave it as is.”
Jane, who had volunteered to help me prepare for going out, seemed determined not to allow any mistakes. Satisfied that I approved of the makeup, she lowered her brush and returned her attention to my hair.
She gathered and styled my hair at the back, decorating it with a leaf-shaped accessory. Only after placing a fork bonnet on my head did she finish.
Once I was ready, I immediately headed to the carriage. Seniel was busy with work, so we had agreed to meet directly at the performance hall.
I sat close to the window seat and opened it to let in the breeze.
While feeling the wind, I decided to set aside my complicated thoughts for a while. At least during the piano recital, I wanted to distance myself from this suffocating reality.
Arriving at the performance hall, I quickly spotted Seniel standing out among the crowd.
I had expected him to be in priestly robes, but perhaps he had changed clothes at the temple—he was wearing a frock coat and vest instead.
‘Wow… he really is handsome.’
Seeing him among so many people made me realize just how striking his appearance truly was. Seniel looked troubled, overwhelmed by people recognizing him.
Even if he managed in private, seeing him so flustered in public made me feel uneasy.
Why is he so flustered even here? Poor guy.
I carefully made my way forward, avoiding being swept up in the crowd.
Good boy, wait there. I’ll rescue you!
I walked briskly toward where Seniel should be.
But then—
‘Huh?’
Amid the crowd, I lost my direction. Seniel, who had been tall and easy to spot above others, suddenly disappeared from view.
Charging forward so recklessly seemed to have been a mistake. What should I do? I couldn’t call him over the phone, and shouting his name loudly would draw attention.
At that moment, a familiar scent reached me. It resembled the one that used to soothe me when he held me at night. Before I could even turn my head, a hand grasped mine.
“Vivi.”
Hearing his gentle voice made my ears perk up. The anxiety of being lost quickly turned into relief.
As I turned, I found myself face-to-face with Seniel. Seeing the relieved smile on his lips left me momentarily speechless.
‘So he could smile like that?’
I realized immediately that the smiles I had seen until now had all been defensive. This unguarded expression, fully revealing his emotions, was undeniably disarming.
Especially since it included relief at seeing me—Seniel had become a collection of pure sincerity disguised as innocence.
“Your Holiness? What brings you here?”
“Your Holiness!”
People around us began to stir upon noticing Seniel’s movement. His smile disappeared.
As the charm faded, I snapped back to my senses and tightened my grip on his hand, shaking my head slightly.
If we were going to escape, now was the time. But hiding and escaping with someone as tall as Seniel was impossible.
I didn’t hesitate long. I pulled his arm, forcing his upper body to bend down.
It was a move that damaged his public dignity, but otherwise he would be surrounded all day.
I quickly untied the bonnet strings beneath my chin and placed the bonnet over Seniel’s head. The wide brim obscured most of his face.
“Let’s hurry!”
Determined to apologize later, I ran into the performance hall.
We made it inside safely. The atmosphere inside was calmer than outside.
Before finding our seats, I removed the bonnet I had put on him.
I figured sitting down should come before apologizing, so I grabbed his hand again and led him forward. Even though it was quieter inside, if people recognized him again, it would cause another commotion.
We checked the tickets and found our seats. Once we sat down, I released his hand.
“Sorry for putting the bonnet on you without asking. I was in a hurry—”
Click. The lights went out mid-apology. It was starting already? Were we that late?
I found myself unable to even catch my breath as the performance began. I still needed to apologize, but the formal atmosphere made me uncertain, and my eyes darted around awkwardly.
Seniel, noticing my restless gaze, gave a faint smile. Then he leaned toward me and whispered softly near my ear.
“It’s okay. And Vivi… today, you look very beautiful.”
“….”
“Of course, you’re always beautiful, so it’s not something I can compare. I just… wanted to tell you that you look beautiful.”
I looked at him at this unexpected compliment. With the hall darkened, his expression wasn’t clearly visible.
As the performer stepped onto the stage, applause filled the room. The sound snapped my wandering thoughts back to reality. I joined in the applause, unable to thank Seniel properly in that moment.
