Chapter 35
Se-niel’s neatly tied long hair came into view. Apart from the morning, he looked as clean and composed as usual. When our eyes met, he looked flustered, his gaze shifting awkwardly. Then he glanced at me again and, unlike in the morning, smiled shyly.
“Good evening. Did you wait long, Vivi?”
Seeing him smile so defenselessly was a first, which left me somewhat flustered. I wondered if something good had happened to him, or if what I had said to him that morning had comforted him.
“…I haven’t been waiting long.”
“I’m glad.”
He smiled again, slightly. My complicated feelings throughout the day were stirred in a different way this time.
His harmless smile was unlike any expression he had shown before. I had never thought I’d be someone who would be captivated by appearance, but his sudden change left me disoriented. He had smiled a few times before, but those smiles had been more gloomy—like they might crumble at any moment.
Se-niel sat down across from me. Seeing him smiling brightly made me feel oddly afraid. They say when a normally quiet person suddenly changes, it’s usually before they die.
Noticing my obvious stare, Se-niel slightly erased his smile.
“Is there something on my face?”
“…No.”
Unable to ask directly, I brushed it off awkwardly. Perhaps embarrassed by my gaze, Se-niel stopped smiling. Even without his smile, he no longer showed his usual unstable demeanor.
As the table was set, a brief silence followed. Just as I reached for water, feeling oddly parched, Se-niel spoke.
“I heard that your friend visited your house today. The reception room probably wasn’t in great condition since it hasn’t been used much, so I’m sorry I couldn’t take care of it in advance. Did you have a good time with your friend?”
What’s this? Why is he speaking without stuttering and holding a proper conversation? His tone was still deferential, but the usual timid demeanor was gone. I paused mid-sip, abandoning my drink and setting the glass down.
“The reception room was fine, so don’t worry about it. And with my friend… yes, I had a good time.”
After finishing, I immediately checked Se-niel’s reaction. Perhaps unaware that I was scrutinizing him, he remained calm and compliant. Even so, he still seemed overly conscious of me, unable to shake his hesitant habits.
Even though the carefully prepared food was getting cold, I couldn’t bring myself to eat. I felt tense, thinking that today’s turbulence might include Se-niel as well. I tried to stay as calm as possible, forming various contingency plans in my head in case he made an unexpected decision.
Should I tell Se-niel that life still holds hope, and at the same time tell him that if he does anything reckless, I’ll die?
But Se-niel spoke first.
“I’ve been thinking. Until now, I believed that since Vivi would feel distressed seeing me, it was better to avoid you.”
My heart tightened, unsure whether these would be my last words or his. My body gradually leaned toward him, ready to stop him if necessary. Se-niel lowered his gaze, then continued.
“But at breakfast and dinner, you inevitably see me. And each time, you’ve always taken care of me… someone as weak and incapable as I am…”
…So what’s the conclusion? I couldn’t dare ask, fearing he might say something reckless. I simply stayed silent and waited for his next words.
“I’ll try. At least when you see me, I want you to feel comfortable… I won’t show such embarrassing sides of myself anymore. I’ll try to be even a little helpful to you, Vivi.”
I let out a deep sigh of relief inwardly. Oh, good boy. I thought he was about to turn the household upside down, but he just brought back the toy he liked.
Too relieved to respond, I remained silent. Se-niel then withdrew his calm smile and looked at me anxiously.
“…Do you dislike it…?”
“No! No, no. I like it. Yes, I really like it.”
The tension in his eyes softened. I must have been wearing a similar expression. As my nerves eased, hunger returned. Letting out a light, relieved laugh, I picked up my fork.
“Seeing you smile like that is nice. I like that attitude. Let’s continue cooperating and live well together.”
I speared the now-cold food with my fork. Though I felt drained, I still forced the food into my mouth. Even cold, it tasted good.
Something suddenly appearing on the table caught my attention.
“A letter?”
Following the hand holding the envelope, I traced it back to Se-niel at the end.
“Vivi… I hope you’ll accept this.”
“What is it?”
I took the letter instinctively but didn’t check its contents. I couldn’t guess what was inside. Money? A blank check?
I looked at Se-niel as if asking for an explanation. He seemed embarrassed, yet also afraid I might refuse.
“It’s a ticket to Largo’s piano recital. I don’t know what you like, but I wanted to give you something…”
“….”
“If you don’t like this, I’ll find something else you prefer, Vivi.”
It was an unexpected gift. Se-niel’s cheeks were faintly flushed as he watched my expression. Seeing that I didn’t react, he couldn’t hide his anxiety.
My silence wasn’t because I disliked the gift. My feelings were just complicated. While Largo hadn’t been mentioned much in the story, Vivi’s memories told me that Largo was the most famous pianist of this era.
So the moment I heard it was a ticket to his recital, I immediately felt the urge to go. There was no way I didn’t like his gift. On the contrary, I liked it.
That made it feel even more complicated. After a day that had already drained me, it felt as though the very source of my stress was now comforting me. The contradictory feeling swirled more and more in my mind the more I thought about it.
Without a word, I opened the envelope and checked the ticket. There was only one—apparently meant for me alone. The date was sometime this week.
“The blackmailer told me not to go…”
Even though going itself still felt scary, I surprisingly wanted to go very badly. I wanted to escape from reality for a moment.
There wasn’t absolutely no way to go without raising suspicion.
I raised my head and met his eyes directly, watching my reaction.
“Se-niel, come with me.”
If I wanted to escape reality for a while through the recital, the only way was to bring the center of this dreadful storm with me.
Although the blackmailer’s letter had mentioned something strange about me not associating with Se-niel, they hadn’t threatened me over my relationship with him, so it seemed fine.
Se-niel’s eyes shook rapidly.
“I, I’m busy, so that—”
“You can’t come?”
Without realizing it, I spoke with a hint of disappointment. Se-niel hesitated, opening and closing his mouth.
“…I’ll try to get another ticket.”
When was the last time I had such cultural leisure? I put the ticket back into the envelope and placed it neatly on the table, a slight smile forming.
Seeing that his promise to try wasn’t empty made me feel, for the first time, a genuine sense of personal goodwill toward him. Until now, it had only been feelings like pity.
“Have I gone crazy? Am I actually feeling goodwill?”
It seemed my mental state was quite worn down. But I couldn’t shake the softened feelings toward him. Since it wasn’t a deep attachment, I judged it wasn’t too dangerous.
I smiled at Se-niel.
“Thank you.”
A short phrase, yet one that carried genuine sincerity. Se-niel’s cheeks turned red, as if relieved.
As the meal neared its end, I suddenly realized I hadn’t brought any flowers and panicked. But soon I regained my composure.
“I received the ticket, and we decided to go together. Isn’t that a better outcome than flowers?”
The goal in negotiating with the blackmailer wasn’t to give flowers, but to improve the relationship. Though it still felt slightly uneasy.
After bathing, changing clothes, and slipping into my bedroom, worry kept bubbling up. Night was deepening, and the time to meet Kid was approaching.
“Surely the blackmailer didn’t immediately tell Kid about what happened with Ronan today…”
If so, then it would just be a matter of “you die, I die.”
I couldn’t sleep deeply due to my heightened nerves and woke immediately at the sound of the door clicking open. I instinctively sat up, checking the intruder.
Moonlight seeped in, faintly outlining the intruder’s figure, though not clearly. The intruder passed by the lamp without touching it and walked straight toward my bed.
“Why… why isn’t the light on?”
It felt unbelievable, so I checked the lamp repeatedly. It remained dark and nonfunctional.
“He’s not going to kill me!”
A faint hope rose as my heart pounded rapidly. That relief lasted only briefly before my chin was grabbed, forcing my head to turn to the side.
“What are you looking at so intently?”
